I vote to upgrade the heroes with no weapons (might be some brass knuckles in there though, hard to tell) to a skill attack called "Jack Slap".

I vote to upgrade the heroes with the bows to a skill attack called "Terrorizing Arrow"

I vote to upgrade the heroes with the swords to a skill attack called "-Insert some name here".

I can't think of anything for the last, but I know all the main heroes with the same skill attack as your typical white hero makes us feel a little...insignificant.